It was a lazy Sunday afternoon and a five-year-old, and eight-year-old and I were hanging out in the living room reading from a joke book. Some jokes were not funny. Some were sort of funny when they were explained. But some sent us all into giggles; and then a retelling just to see if they would be funny again (some were). I realize this is a “You hadda be there” situation, but these are ten of our favorite jokes and riddles.
1. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
2. What did the dog say when he sat on the sandpaper? “Ruff!”
3. (This one is funnier because two of us share a name) Knock, knock. Who’s there? Eileen. Eileen who? Eileen on your doorbell but it doesn’t ring.
4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Gorilla. Gorilla who? Gorilla me a hamburger, I’m hungry.
5. What letters are not in the alphabet? The ones in the mailbox.
6. Why can’t a bike stand up by itself? Because it is two-tired.
7. Why did the duck cross the road? It was taped to the chicken.
8. Which clown wears the biggest shoes? The one with the biggest feet.
9. What goes “oom oom”? A cow walking backwards. (this one was probably hilarious because I looked so funny saying “ooooom ooooooooom.”
10. What is a twip? What a wabbit takes when it wides a twain.
Hope this at least made you smile.
And, you may not want to admit it if you know who said, “Is that a chicken joke?”