A CHICKEN AND A STICK

When we were kids on the farm my brother asked me to help him catch a chicken so he could show me a magic trick. In no time we had one of Mom’s little red hens cornered in the barnyard. Brother had me bring a small stick while he gathered her up and smoothed her feathers until she was calm. Holding on to her legs, he laid her down on her side. He had me place her head against the ground and used the stick to draw a straight line in the dirt away from her beak. He repeated drawing the line a few times and the chicken went into a trance. She relaxed and lay perfectly still for several minutes before getting up, fluffing her feathers and strolling away.

Contrary to legend, a little red hen is not intelligent. She can’t plant wheat or bake bread. In fact, a laying hen is about the most simple-minded creature created. Therefore, hypnotizing a chicken is an easy thing to do. I thought this was marvelous and decided later to see if I could repeat the stunt. Sure enough, when I drew the line with the stick the hen went into a tranquil state of bliss with her little yellow eyes staring up at the sky. She continued to lay there…for a long time. Like the sorcerer’s apprentice I did not know how to undo the spell. Fearing I had ruined a valuable laying hen, I left her reclined in the driveway, grabbed the stick and ran away as fast as my short legs would carry me. I watched from a hiding place and finally, to my relief, the hen picked herself from the dust and wandered off.

I am not making this up. In fact, if you Google “hypnotizing a chicken” you will probably find plenty of verifying sources. This makes me wonder about the intelligence of people who are easily hypnotized.

COMPLICATIONS AND EDUCATIONS

So, I’m old enough to know the words to all twenty-one verses of Don McLean’s American Pie and the interpretation thereof. And I saw Disney’s Alice in Wonderland when it first hit the movie theaters. I grew up on a dairy farm so I had a childhood rich in fertilizer, but short on store bought toys. That does not mean I didn’t have toys. My siblings and I could spend a whole afternoon entertaining ourselves with a good mud hole, some rocks and a couple of sticks. It got even better if we could involve the dog and a few chickens.

Over the years I have tried my best to keep up with the technologies thrown at me at an increasingly dizzying speed. When I first started working in graphics everything was done with an xacto knife and markers. When a computer was put on my desk I struggled through the software and the upgrades, loving the way drudgery was diminished and hating the frustrations that came with learning new tools.

I went from a tape player to CD’s to mp3’s. I figured out how to use a cell phone, a digital camera, a video camera and have combined music and pictures into short movies. Each new gadget came with a book of instructions that were boggling, frustrating and confusing. However, it has been worth the effort when the technology became familiar and fun.

R. D. Hales said, “Never dwell on the past or attempt to protect your comfort zone against the changes required to meet future advancements. Past learning creates a valuable foundation of experience upon which to build; not a comfortable place to dwell for a lifetime.”

That being said, I still think there are now way too many technical gadgets and not nearly enough playing in puddles.

SNOW PLOW

The hearty souls who spend hours driving snow plows, usually in blizzard conditions, and often all night have a thankless job. Without their hard work their neighbors would be unable to travel down the streets and roads.

However, they have to put all that snow somewhere; and it usually ends up in huge ridges across the driveways. We live on a dead-end street --four houses on each side. In years past the city sent a front loader to clear the way. They pushed the snow either into the vacant lot at the end, or dumped it into the canal at the other. Now there is a house at the end of the street.

The city sends THE BLADE, a large road grader


that backs down our street, lowers the blade,


and drives forward--forcing ALL the snow in the street to one side---our side.


DH was shoveling out the parking area around the cars this morning when the snow plow went by. I won't tell you what he said when the snow was emptied into our drive. AGAIN.