Monday, October 27, 2014


Late yesterday evening her breathing became ragged and she started leaking ice water.  We gathered the softening food from her freezer and stashed it in our big upright freezer in the basement.

 This morning we put the rest of the food in an ice chest with ice from the big freezer, said our goodbyes---

---and pulled the plug.  Old Sandy had been with us through big parties and weddings. 
She’d patiently cared for our lettuce and leftovers while humming quietly along for a couple of decades.

She couldn’t have chosen a better time to go.  I had planned to clean the spilled syrup, soggy lettuce and fuzzy unidentifiable food objects off her racks this week.  We are expecting kids, spouses and grandkids to rock the place on Halloween and then an even bigger gathering is planned for Thanksgiving Weekend.

Like Sipsey told Idgie when Ruth breathed her last, “She was a lady and a lady always knows when to leave.”

Our next task was to find a replacement before the Major Appliance Virus which caused Sandy’s demise spread to the dishwasher or the dryer.  In fact we didn’t even speak of the incident in the car for fear of an outbreak.

We went to visit our neighbor who, over the years, has given us great deals on a water heater, washer, dryer, and recently sold us a wonderful stainless steel gas range with black trim. 

She had several refrigerators in stock the same size as our old one. We said no to the one that was toilet white.  There was a floor model waiting for a replacement handle that had been broken in shipping.  It was in our price range but it was black. For another three hundred dollars we could have it in stainless.  If we wanted to spend even more money we could have a fridge big as a walk-in with ice maker, filtered water dispenser in the door and a freezer big enough to stash a body.

 We made our choice and, almost before we could get home to clean up the gunk and leaked body fluids, two buff guys arrived, picked up Sandy and carried her to their truck.

 Then just as skillfully they carried our new refrigerator up the steps—

 --and into our kitchen.

 The guys put on the unbroken handle and promised they’d have a replacement for the broken freezer door handle delivered in a couple of days.  The new fridge looked good next to our black trimmed stove and black dish washer.  We plugged it in, filled it with food and stuck the photos of our kids on the door with magnets, something we couldn’t have done with a stainless fridge.

 I think we’ll call him Darth.


Val said...

WAIT! You're getting an actual handle? In our house, two drawer knobs would have been screwed into the freezer door before the food had time to chill.

joeh said...

Do appliances go in threes?

I hope not.

Great title.

Janice Grinyer said...

good lord.

after reading this, i now feel like i treat my fridge like a one night stand.

must get her some candy and flowers to stick in there....

Love the new "Darth!"


TALON said...

Darth! Welcome to your new home! Leenie, I cracked up. So true - the appliances do conspire and you were soooo wise to keep the talk to a minimum. :)

I thought I was the only one who named inanimate (but highly necessary and important) appliances. There was a rumor that a particularly clever microwave was picking up wifi signals so you can't be too careful what you type on here. :)

Joanne Noragon said...

Darth is perfect!
I think Sandy gave you a good run.

Unknown said...

I will have to play Darth a theme song when I get there! super "cool"! did you say darth makes his own ice??? WHAAAAA???

Leenie said...

Darth has an ice maker but we're not excited about hooking it up. Just another thing to go wonky and cause water damage while we're away on a vacation.

Anonymous said...

He's a handsome devil (the fridge I mean)...may the force be with you.

Buttons Thoughts said...

Oh this made me laugh I am going to be looking at my old frig in a different way. I think Feralwoman said it about right. Great writing. Hug B

Alica said...

No problem! :) I've done the same thing myself on occasion. I sure wish they'd change that feature. Hope Darth works well for a very long time!

Kathy G said...

Glad you were able to get everything to safety before Sandy went to refrigerator heaven.

Linda Sue said...

great choice...though I would have gone with the one that could have held a body...never know when that could come in handy. Stainless, no, magnets are the only thing holding our fridge together, stainless is for bachelors...

Terry and Linda said...

You made me laugh...Darth is a rather apt name!!!


Carla said...

You are so funny!! It's terribly, terribly true about appliance viruses though!! We once had a great outbreak in the summertime. I dried all my clothes on a line for almost the entire summer. Got a new dishwasher and a new fridge for the garage. We also got a new air conditioning unit and a hot water heater. It was a pandemic to say the least!!